Self-tanning is ‘spensive be it a salon tan or a tanning lotion. It’s really a stupid added cost that you could go without. Good thing it’s winter because now you can break out those turtle necks. With a conservative wardrobe which may also make it impossible to distinguish if you’re really just a pretty tranny in an awful top and your Zooey bangs obviously already covering half your forehead, the amount of skin needing a tan has all but disappeared. If, after this, you still find yourself in a financial bind you might try wearing a burqa. Let  the world know your eyelids just come back from a weekend in South Beach.